Work has been tough. My job is somewhat in peril and it is sobering to say the least. I don't want to get into it but it has affected my workout regime. I took off Wednesday and Thursday, ran 6 miles on Friday, played flag football on Saturday and was a complete piece of crap on Sunday. I even cheated on the diet on Sunday. I caved. I needed some bad carbohydrates so I devoured cavatelli and broccoli. It was delicious but I did feel bad doing it. I just don't like to quit on things (shoot to my father disagreeing strongly) and I almost quit the diet whole right there and then.
I didn't but to make things even more pleasant to my failures, I found out I was cheating on the diet without realizing it.
Remember when I was harmonizing in the revelation I could have sushi? I was wrong. You can't have raw fish.
Eff
Really?
Raw Fish?
I don't know the science of it but author Alejandro Hunger strongly urges not to have raw fish as it is detrimental to the cleanse process.
Translation: This is a microcosm of my recent struggles.
It is going to be difficult to properly reflect on this diet without adding the psychology altering the results. I admit it is fabulous I can have a meal and feel energize afterwards but with the recent troubles with work, I feel it is affecting me mentally, spiritually, and even physically.
My latest runs have been lackluster. On Friday, I planned to do a tough 11.5 mile run but cut it to 6. I was terribly stiff and couldn't break out of it. I tried different things, even added some surges to try and loosen things up. No dice. My body restricted itself from performing at a higher level, which was extremely disappointing since I had a great breakthrough with the cleanse. I felt wonderful during the day and feeling the two days rest would have revitalized my stride and training output. Not the case. Quite the contrary to be exact. It happens from time to time but I felt this one to be different. In the runs I feel stiff, I usually breakout of it by mile 4 at the very latest but it would not go away. With all of the stress, emotion, and lack of calories, it has affected my ability to train properly.
Stress affects us in ways we can't even imagine. Even today's science can't put their finger on it. With all of the bearing pressures each day presents, it can damage our ability to perform in physically daunting tasks. It doesn't even have to be athletic. It could be stuff you do in your sleep. Hell, it affects your sleep too! Then, you start to question things that are usually second nature. It destroys your confidence and damages your personality. Stress does strange things to the human body. The best sociologists and neurologists can't figure it out because stress affects people differently and is dictated by the situation and environment.
I usually handle stress very well but this one is defeating me. Maybe I feel this way because this can affect Lindsay and I a great deal and I don't want to put us in that position. She goes through enough as it is (and I am including my day-to-day BS), she doesn't need my failures to affect her success.
The point I am trying to make is I am going through a wave of feelings and emotions since I started this diet and I can't figure out which is what. Is starving myself of needed calories damaging my ability to feel good? Or is it stress from work? Or both? I can't properly answer that elementary question. All I can say is I am going to push this, get back on track and finish this diet. I have learned a lot and the lessons will be taken into account when I return to my normal diet.
Now, I will leave you with this video because I am going to get on the bike and ride for an a good hour.
Stay Tuned
I stayed with 80 10 10 too long and made myself sick not heeding the early and persistent warning sign of exhaustion. Be careful! If it is your job stress, I certainly hope that improves too.
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